Dive-Monster Rhoody

There are quite some things in life people just should not do. I am always the guy testing my limits and I discovered another NONO.

I was in Subic with Mike my Typhoon diver and my good friend Kim Beermonster. Those who read my blog frequently heard about the Beermonsters abilities to drink whole Islands dry. After a wonderful day and an awesome dive with dolphins and a false killerwhale, we left our Hotel in Subic to go out for dinner and a “small” barhop.

As I made a wrong comment during the day somewhen, I saw in the mean smile of the Beermonster that he was on a mission to destroy me and make me forget my mother language and to sound Danish in the final stages.

It all started quite well with a dinner at Blue Rock Resort. After that we hit the bars along the road. The beginning of the end came when we were invited by some bar manager to have a couple of shooters. I can drink tons of beer, but one shooter just kicks me out off my shoes.

I remember the second shooter some when at 1 am in the morning was a black Sambuca… not that I did it like the taste, but I felt my vision narrowing on the spot after drinking it.

It was like in a old movie theater at the end of the movie when the big curtain is closing slowly. The only difference was that in my case the lights were switched off after closing the curtain. Witnesses told me that I sneaked out around 2 am and headed towards my Hotel.

The next thing I remember was waking up in my room. I did a body-check to find out happily that no major outer damage was done. I ignored the headache and went for a late breakfast around 12:30pm.

Around 1pm the Beermonster came into the restaurant. Somehow he still had the same mean grin on his face I remembered from 15 hours ago… In his hands a bottle of SMB…

Hey, wait a minute the Beermonster does not drink SMB, he drinks that nasty rice-beer SML.

He placed the SMB in front of my Hang-over-nose and explained me that I left a full open SMB on the table when sneaking out. According to his law this can’t happened and he decided that the SMB will follow me wherever I go until I drink it.

So here I sit now… headache, hang-over, with a lukewarm 12 hour open SMB in front and a nasty grinning Beermonster next to me. I try to negotiate and find another solution but after about starring 20 minutes at the bubble-less yellow liquid I saw no other way out than pouring it down…  the rest is history…

Bottom-line: Lesson learned… don’t go out with the Beermonster if you can’t follow the rules…

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After spending some days of deep meditation inside my guestroom in Angeles I was mentally and physically prepared and back on track to have a look how 2009 really looks like outside my 4 walls. I could not recognize any changes. The girls were busy in the kitchen to help “Iron Chef-Beermonster” to prepare dinner. The basement for each of his outstanding delicious dishes is 3 to 4 metric tons of garlic and onions in a ratio 2:1. Usually 3 girls need around 5 hours of hard focused work to peel  and slice the needed amounts for the Iron Chef. As I love those ingredients, there is no doubt that it will be a fantastic meal for me.

Occasionally the Iron Chef appears and after a 2 second look at the trays he comments: more garlic!…

When everything is done to an appropriate amount he starts thinking about what the final ingredient will be…. Usually chicken in various styles. Side dishes may include rice, chili, garlic bread and more chili.

The poor kitchen helper washed their hands with oxalic acid after finishing cooking  to get them cleaned properly from the garlic-smell, knowing that the next trucks will deliver more before lunch-time.

Don’t ask me why nobody wanted to talk to us when we went out after dinner to have a few cold ones in some of the local bars. Even the waitresses gave us their cell-numbers and asked us to txt them if we have another order.

Even the valued reader might not believe it, I loved each of the meals and as everybody knows, Garlic is very healthy, guess that’s why I am so gwapo.

Cheers
Rhoody

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